The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Quotes: “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” is an American period comedy-drama television series, created by Amy Sherman-Palladino, that premiered on March 17, 2017, on Prime Video. The series stars Rachel Brosnahan as Miriam “Midge” Maisel, a housewife in late 1950s and early 1960s New York City who discovers she has a knack for stand-up comedy.
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Quotes
1- “I just don’t want to be alone. I just do not want to be insignificant.”
2 “Your daddy is crazy…now let’s measure that forehead.”
3- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : It’s downtown. If you have underwear on, you’re overdressed.
4- Abe to Joel: “Your pedestrian safety is of no concern to me.”
5- Susie Myerson : “Spontaneity works until it doesn’t work. Then you’re stuck.”
6- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “You’ve heard about the shorthand girls? These are girls whose skill in life is not writing full sentences.”
7- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “The world is full of disappointments, and sometimes people let you down. You can’t just run away.”
8- Joel Maisel : Do you know what a dream is? A dream is what keeps you going in a job you hate.
10- Abe Weissman : “Just because there is a door does not mean you use it. A door does not represent infinite possibilities.”
11- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “We have children. We will have to see each other forever. Until we are dead. And then for four to six months after.”
12- Abe Weissman : “Everything we bring on ourselves is our own fault.”
13- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : ” If women don’t realize what’s going on in the world, they can’t step in and fix it. Because they WILL fix it. And accessorize it!”
14- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “I’m officially losing my mind, which is perfect. Now I will be alone and crazy, the famous mad divorcée of the upper West Side.”
15- Joel Maisel : “The first time I laid eyes on you, that was it for me.”
16- Abe Weissman : “I still control this house! I’m just doing it from in there.”
17- Susie Myerson : “I got up at 9:30. In the morning. You know the last time I was up at 9:30 in the morning? It was the last time I stayed out all night and got home at 9:30 in the morning.”
18- Susie Myerson : “I don’t mind being alone. I just do not want to be insignificant.”
19- Abe Weinberg : “Life isn’t fair. It’s hard and cruel. You have to pick your friends as if there’s a war going on.”
20- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “All that applause for me? What am I, putting out after? One standing ovation, everyone goes home pregnant.”
21- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “Me, personally, I was never great at gift-giving. Maybe it’s because I never got to celebrate Christmas. I got Hanukkah. Doesn’t exactly prepare you the same way.”
22- Abe Weissman : “Sometimes I tune people out, but mostly because they rarely have anything useful or interesting to say.”
23- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “Calling that thing a house is like calling the Vatican a church.”
24- Susie Myerson : “I stay here. And I sweat. And I smell like a bum. And I’m miserable, and I want to kill people. And I do that till it gets cold.”
25- Miriam ‘Midge’ Maisel : “See, my life completely fell apart today, and here’s why. My father-in-law owns my house. And he took it back when his son left me. Actually, that doesn’t sound funny at all.”
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Season 4 Quotes
26- “Two antisemitic Nazis walk into a bar, and one says to the other, “Who does your taxes?”” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
27- “My mother is turning my kitchen upside down and my father is in the bathroom topless using my lipstick!” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
28- “Rose, I admit that sometimes I don’t listen to you, but this time I was listening to you when you did not tell me that you shtupped my best friend.” -Abe Weissman
29- “Boys knock ‘cause girls have knockers.” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
30- “You are the frog. I am the scorpion. I sting because it is my nature.” -Abe Weissman
31- “My singing isn’t perfect, but in musical theatre, character is more important than technique” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
32- “The rabbi thought for sure he got bit by a snake. I sucked on that man ’til he almost passed out. On his ankle, that is.” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
33- “I don’t trust soup. It tells you it’s food but you eat it and you’re never full. feels like a scam.” -Joel Maisel
34- “Do not sleep on the couch. It wears out the cushions faster than just every day sitting.” -Abe Weissman
35- “I was transcribing Finnegan’s Wake. It feels like you’re writing gibberish but apparently, he’s a genius.” -Imogene
36- “I actually think God is more of a brilliant marketing ploy.” -Abe Weissman
37- “God, honey, you are so sweet and innocent. Like an elf riding a bunny rabbit.” -Mitzi
38- “Believe me, honey, if there’s a hell, I’m the headliner.” -Lenny Bruce
The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Season 5 Quotes
39- “Did you know the day after Thanksgiving is the busiest day for plumbers?” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
40- “He said he thought I was very talented and that I could be bigger than Houdini, which is ridiculous. I’m already bigger than Houdini. Houdini was a very tiny man. That’s why he fit so easily in a box.” -Alfie
41- “I’m tired of people mocking me for thinking about how a dress works in different situations.” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
42- “I’m having the best time with my new friends, Whatsisname and Whatsername. They’re from Somewhere, and they came here to celebrate Something.” -Shirley Maisel
43- “I don’t know what grown women talk like. I deal with comics.” -Susie Myerson
44- “However you like to make it is how I like to take it.” -Joel Maisel
45- “Everyone thinks it’s the ladies who are scared, but we have mothers, best friends, rabbis, school nurses, magazines scaring the shit out of us, the minute we get our first period. We’re ready. The men, however…” -Shirley Maisel
46- “I love everything about you. I love that you are on time. I love that you hang pictures straight and always, without measuring, perfectly centered. I love that you don’t lose money. I love that you never stain a wooden spoon. I love that you lift with your legs. And I love that I am your wife.” -Zelda
47- “I cannot expose unmarried women to nude wood floors. It would feel like a brothel.” -Rose Weissman
48- “Look, you started your career by getting up on a stage that no one told you to get up on, saying a bunch of shit no one wanted you to say. So, tits up.” -Susie Myerson
49- “God, I love a man who steals my food.” -Miriam “Midge” Maisel
50- “Sometimes it takes falling in the shower for everything to become very clear.” -Moishe Maisel