Hazbin Hotel tells the story of Charlie, a princess of Hell who pursues the seemingly impossible goal of rehabilitating demons to peacefully reduce overpopulation in her kingdom. Charlie Morningstar is a princess of Hell tasked with the monumental task of rehabilitating demons. The task leads her to open the Hazbin Hotel, a place where doomed souls can work on their own and eventually “check out” to Heaven.
Hazbin Hotel Quotes
1- “Well, I’m starved! Who wants some Jambalaya?” -Alastor
2- “It’s the purest kind, my dear. Reality! True passion! After all, the world is a stage, and a stage is a world of entertainment.” -Alastor
3- “Welcome to the Happy Hotel! You are going to love it here!” -Charlie
4- “What? You think you can buy me with a wink and some cheap booze?! Well, you can!” -Husk
5- “Consider it an investment in ongoing entertainment for myself! I want to watch the scum of the world struggle to climb up the hill of betterment! Only to repeatedly trip, and tumble down to the fiery pit of failure.” -Alastor
6- “Why does anyone do anything? Sheer, absolute boredom!” -Alastor
7- “Hahahaha! Oh! Is that Blitzo my sensors spot up there? I guess the kiddies are still runnin’ away from you, huh? Hahaha!” -Robo Fizz
8- “Stop right there! Cabrón hijo de perra! I know your game. And I’m not gonna let you hurt anyone here! You pompous, cheesy, talk show shitlord!” -Vaggie
9- “Ya know…’Cause hotels are for people passing through…temporarily.”-Charlie
10- “Edge Lord!” -Cherri
11- “You will be entrusted with the study of the earth’s skies—the stars, the prophecies, they hold all that stuff. Isn’t that fun?” -Paimon
12- “You want it, I got it. See what you like? We could have it all by the end of the night. Your money and power. My sinful delight. A hit of that Heaven and Hell. A helluva high!” -Cherri
13- “Hey! This body is flawless! Everyone wants summa me, and I’ve got the creepy fan letters to prove it!” -Angel
14- “I’ll tell you all about when you here. It’s in regards to a business venture I’m sure will be very worth your time.” -Crimson
15- “We wanted to properly discuss the terms of this divorce. I feel like my darling sister deserves a bit more… compensation. After all, you did CHEAT on the poor thing. Surely you owe…” -Andrealphus
16- “Hah! Read ’em and weep, boys! Full Ho-… …-tel? What the fuck is this? You!” -Husk
17- “Whatever pisses you off more. Is there seriously no liquor in here?!” -Angel
18- “Give me a thrust! Show me some lust! From the groin to the bust! In desire we trust, in the House of Asmodeus” -Asmodeus
19- “We’re here to convince you not to kill yourself, sir. To grant you a blessing, on behalf of those in Heaven benefited by your amazing technological advances.” -Collin
20- “Hi, I’m Niffty! It’s nice to meet you! It’s been a while since I’ve made new friends!” -Niffty
21- “Just please follow the talking points we went over. And do not sing!” -Vaggie
22- “I’m hungover from this morning, dumbass!” -Loona
23- “I’ll just have to resort to my impeccable improv skills.” -Charlie
24- “Look around, Lyle. God’s gift of nature is a wonder to behold, regard less of age…or wealth!” -Cletus
25- “The only reason you’re still here is because Daddy gave you and your Hellborn kind a pardon from an Exorcist blade. How does that feel? To know how little you matter?” –Lute
26- “Excuse my sudden visit, but I saw your fiasco on the picture show and I just couldn’t resist. What a performance! Why, I haven’t been that entertained since the stock market crash of 1929, hahaha…. So many orphans.” -Alastor
27- “I’d like to see the suits at corporate call us losers, now. That was pretty badass!” -Agent One
28- “You know, ya really gotta watch what comes outta your mouth. I’ve been making these sex jokes the whole time, and it’s obvious you ain’t catching on.. I mean, it’s just- sad!” -Angel
29- “Well, howdy! I’m Cletus! Welcome to Heaven! Guess you did something good to get here, and good people deserve to give loved ones special blessings!” -Cletus
30- “He-llo!” -Alastor
31- “Angels don’t make mistakes. […] I know that.” –Lute
32- “They are definitely from Hell. They must use this dark magic to cross over into our world… and they seem to be killing specifically-targeted people. But, why?” -Agent Two
33- “Yeah, yeah. Listen, keep this discreet ya hear me? I can’t let it get out I’m offerin’ my services to randos in the street! It was a quick cash grab… Ya got it?” -Angel
34- “It’s me, Mammon! And I’m here to announce the amazing new brand: Fizzie!! We got a Fizzie for every occasion! We got fluffy, toy Fizzie, fireman Fizzie, therapist Fizzie, wait in line for you Fizzie, doctor Fizzie: beeps every time it senses cancer! Fat Fizzie, skinny Fizzie, so many Fizzies! And if you wanna fuck ’em, you can! We got Fizzies for the kids, Fizzies for the teens, and Fizzies for you sick, fucking degenerate adults! We got ’em all! All based on my new face, Fizzieee!” -Mammon
35- “Ohh…crumbs.” -Moxxie
36- “Woo-hoo-hoo! What is up party people!” -Chazwick
37- “People LOVE musicals, sir.” -Millie
38- “…Well, Christ on a stick. I guess there is a God.” -Blitzo
39- “Spoiler alert, the butter is spoiled.” -Blitzo
40- “Oh, God. It was one time! If I hadn’t slept with that privileged ASSHOLE, none of us would have access to the living world!” -Blitzo
41- “Hey, excuse me. What’s “obnoxious” about a super fun jingle, alright? It’s a fun distraction when an advertisement is spittin’ bullshit!” -Blitzo
42- “This is Hell, Millie. No one cares about cars being clean here, okay? Oooh, what about a billboard?” -Blitzo
43- “Cheers honey! Thank you for coming! Do you need anything? Are you having fun? Are you good? Are you drunk? Okay good, okay great.” -Beelzebub
44- “Ow ow! Y’all ready to party with the Queen Bee of Gluttony” -Beelzebub
45- “Torches, I say, I say! Get your inconvenient torches here!” -Wally